Yesterday morning at 0730 I arrived at a friends house. I tried to walk in the front door but I couldn't, it was blocked by stuff in the hall. I scrambled through and found her dog sitting on a pile of clothes in the lounge. I couldn't see the lounge floor. I couldn't see the sofa, the coffee table or the corner table. I had a peek into the kitchen. The sides were totally covered in plates, paperwork, pots. Well actually, you name it and it was there.
My friend can cook really well, she has excellent taste in clothes, home decor and ornaments. Her parents house is not like this so it's not as if she thinks its normal.
Sadly she has had a few issues over the years and just cannot, as the saying goes, get her house in order. She had told me it was bad but WOW, nothing had prepared me for today.
She works full time and had raised three boys on her own. The house has always been messy but today was unbelievable. She always blamed the boys and they always blamed her. Now two of them have moved out, she has admitted it is her.
She constantly tries to escape from the house. She goes to help look after rescue dogs, visits other people. She does everything to get away from the problem. She can't bear coming home.
We started work immediately and at 1430 that afternoon we had made a small dent. She displayed the hoarding symptoms of,it might be needed later, so and so wants that, it's really nice on, I bought it to wear to fancy dress. Honestly, she had loads of fancy dress clothes and I don't think she has ever been to a fancy dress party. I did do a few sly removals into the boot sale box when she wasn't looking.
The hall was clear, the lounge, Well better. There is a floor and you can sit on the sofa.
The kitchen looks like a normal kitchen now. Clear sides, washing up done and put away.
She goes to boot sales every weekend and totally fills the house up with clothes. She is a hoarder.
Today, these are going back!
There were 10 huge rubbish sacks outside and a huge, huge amount of boot sale items.
It will be impossible to hang it all up on a clothes rail so we are going to have to do the plastic sheet and dump pile. There is going to be a huge amount of rummaging.
That was my yesterday, hot, sweaty, dusty and dirty. That's her house, not me but I've had my moments!
Am I mad to spend a precious day off like this? Yes
Will she keep the house like this now? Probably not.
I rang her last night and she told me she was going off to a boot sale before we do ours this afternoon! Noooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Friends do things for each other no matter what.
I had many friends tell me, beg me and ask me not to do things which I ignored and did anyway and that's a whole different blog for another time.
We're they my friends after? Yes and that's what matters.
Have a lovely Sunday, hot and sticky here but Ill be moaning my head off in January when it's freezing and dark in the mornings so hey, enjoy!
Bootie report to follow.........
Much love
X
You are a very good friend. I think there is something about being short of money that when you actually get some money wants you to prepare or stockpile for when or if money becomes tight again. It makes you hold on to stuff in case you need it in the future. It is a very difficult mind set to break xxx
ReplyDeleteI think you are right. She struggles so she keeps.
DeleteYou are a wonderful friend for doing it, simple as! The fact that she let you help is brilliant :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Tracy. Still a long way to go.
DeleteWhat a lovely thing to do for your friend. I never understood what made people hoard stuff until I got into crafting- there is no material in the world I could say no to. I will be making a dent in it this summer holidays, but I think I might have to have a clear out of the stuff I am never going to use too :)
ReplyDeleteShe says she feels so much better no there is space.
DeleteI didn't realise there were so many people with hoarding problems until they started all those TV programmes- which I can't bear to watch - frightening . So I think you were brilliant going to help your friend. It's a scary problem.
ReplyDeleteI know, I saw those programmes too. Do you remember Richard the oldish man who had to crawl inside?
DeleteYou're a great mate and I'm sure she appreciates your time and effort : )
ReplyDeleteThanks. It was hard graft and so hot too. She made £100 today by selling some so that was food.
DeleteActually, it was good too.
ReplyDeleteI thought was a lot of food!! ; )
DeleteThere's times when we've all needed a good friend and seems you're one such lady !
ReplyDelete