Translate

Wednesday 13 March 2013

Can you have treats when you have debts?

Dear reader,

As we are off work I feel like we are on holiday, a bit. This is my excuse for spending yesterday.
The trouble is, most of the time I am really good. Very frugal with food, heating and I never buy any clothes or get my hair cut. In fact I am looking a bit scruffy at the moment.
I don't want to buy any clothes either because I am too fat!

Anyway, yesterday we decided to drive to the shops and we treated ourselves to, wait for it.................
A bath mat. £16

I also bought my mum a new kettle. She lives in a hard water area here in Kent and the filter had disintegrated. I had tried to descale it and gave it a bit of a scrub on the outside and torn all the colouring off. £25 reduced from £50

Then, as it was cold and wintery, I got hungry. We didn't want anything junk foodie so we drove past a Toby car very and popped in.  As you know we don't eat out and we hadn't had a Toby for some years. It was packed when we went in, retired people, groups of friends, families with pre school children. I was surprised for a Tuesday. It was ok inside, tables all clean, no frills but it was fine.

The carvery was brilliant, there was a choice of four joints, Turkey, gammon, pork and beef. A huge selection of vegetables, parsnips, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower cheese, peas, mashed potato, roast potatoes and huge, fluffy, fresh Yorkshire pudding. Also a large bowl of crackling for non dieters!
I am ashamed to say, I deemed myself a non dieter yesterday. I had the lot, piled it up, lashings of hot gravy and I ate the lot. I think I got my £6.25 worth. The meal for two of us with drinks was £16.

So our spend yesterday was £57. I feel a bit naughty.
Sometimes on my frugal journey I feel hard done by and that I'm not getting much out of life. I miss the nice things, I miss the perfume, the hairdresser, the meals out, the holiday, the shoes the clothes.
I do have down days like this but I have to be strong and remember the dreaded debts. How I won't have to pay them every month, no more interest charges, no more worrying and checking accounts and shuffling money around.

So yesterday we had a treat, a bath mat and a cheap meal. We work hard, long hours. We no longer smoke so that's a huge saving and I want us to have a bit of a treat now and then to make it all feel worthwhile.

Does it sound bad, am I making excuses or should we have a few treats?
What do you do reader when you feel like this or is it just me?

Let me know. I read and reply to every comment.

Thanks for reading,

Sarah x

25 comments:

  1. Sometimes you absolutely must have a treat or thing will grind you so far down that you will give up. Sign up with Toby online and every month they send out a two eat for £10 voucher, therefore saving another £2.50. It is can be used everyday except Sunday, so makes a great Saturday night date night treat! Enjoy your treats as they are Rae and make them even more precious. Xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Fran,

      Thank you, that's made me feel less guilty. I will sign up now. You're right it does feel like a real treat when you do go out. I guess that's a bonus!

      Thanks
      Sarah x

      Delete
  2. Aww, you're in Kent, I wonder if you're near me down on the coast?
    I think it's perfectly acceptable to have the odd little treat, lunch out and a new bath mat could almost be classed as essentials! :-)

    And a lovely gesture to buy your mum a kettle, they get ruined here because of the bloomin' water!

    Don't be so hard on yourself, it's about being better not perfect!!
    x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Mabelandmaisy,

      Near the coast, sandwich near ham which always makes me laugh!
      I sounded a right old saddo with my bath mat didn't I. It is a posh one!

      Yes the water here is awful, I think it tastes different. You are right, better not perfect and I have made some huge changes.

      Just had a bit of snow earlier, hope it won't settle.

      Sarah x

      Delete
    2. I'm in Walmer!! And you've been to Westwood Cross Toby!! :-)) x

      Delete
    3. Oh you're just up the road! The weather looks better today, at last. Xxx

      Delete
  3. I think the bath mat and the kettle were essentials and you are right, no matter how frugal you are day to day we all have to have little treats. Your treat was a meal and saved you from cooking at home so if you take those costs into consideration then your treat wasn't so expensive after all :-)

    Karen x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Karen,

      Essentials, yes I like that word.
      It was nice to to cook and I do,love a roast dinner!
      I do feel a bit deprived sometimes.

      Sarah x

      Delete
  4. The occasional treat won't hurt and you don't have to justify yourself to others on blogland either. I like the Toby and I like that its ready and no waiting for ages to eat. We have one not far from us and we do go in occasionally.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Miss PB. I know I don't have to justify it but you know what it's like when you read how well everyone says they are doing, paying off their mortgages and stuff. If a girl can't have a bath mat and agood scoff though.....

      Delete
    2. My husband has asked me if I want to go tonight ;-)

      Delete
    3. If you go on their website and join the one you go to they send you an immediate voucher for two courses for the same price as just the carvery so you can have a starter or desert. I think it's only soup or ice cream but hey.

      Enjoy yourselves
      Sarah x

      Delete
    4. I agree with Miss PB - you really don't have to justify yourself to anyone. Everyone's circumstances are different. Some people overpay their mortgage by an amount greater than my entire monthly income. I don't think that means they're doing any better than I am - I still overpay my mortgage despite being on a very low income. I have a budget of 100.00 per month for all food, toiletries and cleaning products for 3 adults, and strangely enough today I blogged about spending what equates to 3.00 per week on my hair. Some would see that as a treat but I'd rather have that than a meal out, a magazine or chocolate. It's all down to individual choice.

      Delete
    5. Wow Scarlet, you do fantastically well on your budget! I agree, it's all down to different choices. The trouble is, sometimes I want to go to the hairdressers, eat chocolate, go for a meal, drink loads and come home to peruse a holiday brochure!
      Oh well can't have it all.......

      Delete
  5. Lol I was at the Toby only last week. We budget one or two meals out each month. It all comes out of the same grocery pot and keeps us sane. Glad to hear you went for the quality option on the bath mat, it'll pay off in long run. Well done !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Emma,

      Yes I think I'll budget for a couple of treats a month especially now we have the smoking money we have saved. £112 so far since last Tuesday.
      Thanks for popping in so regularly, it's nice to read the comments.

      Sarah x

      Delete
  6. We'd all like to be frugal every step of the way, but by the same token life is for living and an occasional treat is what can keep all of us on the straight and narrow. My treat today was to buy a bottle of wine to have with supper as I had a friend coming round. A frugal meal washed down with good company and a glass of tempranillo. And I totally agree with Miss PB - no need to justify it either... You're doing brilliantly so an occasional treat is definitely allowed...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi Katie Jane,

    Thanks for your supportive words. You're so right as is miss PB. I popped in to your blog, you are very clever, wish I could be more crafty. Would love to quilt!

    Sarah x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Sarah
      Thanks for your kind words about my crafting. I only wish I had more time to devote to it, but that would need a major lottery win so that I could give up work and I can't see that happening as I don't buy a ticket!! I haven't done any quilting for years, but funnily enough it's on my list of things to do this year - maybe we could support each other through the learning process?
      Take care
      KJ xx

      Delete
  8. When we were paying off our mortgage we included lots of treats. It wouldn't have been possible otherwise and you can be creative about your treats to get your moneys worth. Also you will have to spend money on essentials as life goes on, things breaks etc.

    I sometimes hit the wall, which made me want to give it up. I never saw an end but it did come and now we are mortgage and debt free. Our treats got us through it. All I would say is PLAN them, then you know your budget and you won't feel guilty.

    Sft x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great advice as usual SFT.
      Thanks

      Sarah x

      Delete
    2. Treats are ESSENTIAL otherwise it all becomes such an absolute grind. They don't have to be expensive, my treats have included reduced price smoked salmon trimmings - only 43p, but so delicious and reduced price parma ham, glorious.
      I have a strict budget of £20.00 a week for food, and anything left over at the end of the week goes into the treat pot. When there is enough we have a takeaway or a meal out. Most weeks there is something left, and the savings soon add up. The promise of a treat helps me to stay on track with the budget.

      Delete
    3. Hi Carrie,

      I like the sound of your treats, yummy. Please tell me what you buy for £20 a week. That's amazing! You do so well and have a bit left over. You just have to be inventive I suppose. Do let me know your meal plans and I would love to reduce our food shopping too.

      Sarah x

      Delete
  9. Treats are essential if you've been used to having them. Most people are like you they can't go whole hog without spending something if they have it, even when they are in debt. The trick is to scale down the amount you spend on a treat and how often you have it, otherwise you will feel very deprived. I know some people save a special amount just for treats. I don't think that would work for me but I haven't tried that yet. In theory it's a good idea if you don't overspend the "treat" funds.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Joyful, what a great name and thank you for popping in. I totally agree with you it is difficult to completely go without. It's a bit like dieting I suppose, for me anyway. If I don't allow myself a little treat I may just splurge and scoff the whole trifle!

      Sarah x

      Delete